Cranberry Sauce

I am Strong, powerful, confident, untouchable, invincible.. Today. I punch my fist in the air of jubilation, victory, glory.. Today. I am unbeatable. I am the best.. Today. The fabric of the universe flows by me, easily.. Today. I am supreme. The ultimate. The best EVER. Today. I have no enemies, I am too strong for them.. Today I am full of myself and I know it. But there isn't a thing anyone can do about it.. Today. There will never be another man as talented, as skillful, as resourceful as I am.. Today. I am in awe of my own capability.. And deliverance.. Today I am better than anyone can ever be.. Today. I am the best there ever will be.. Today. I smash records for fun.. Today There's just no stopping me. Today I will be an example to everyone that ever tries.. Today I do what I want, when I want.. Today I cannot possibly do anything wrong.. Today Tomorrow I will try again.

Filling itself in a loop, I go and come inside and outside of myself I am complete I belong I have home I will always have home (I believe) I don't need to fight anymore, or to prove I am not ashamed, guilty, afraid I am in harmony I feel the fabric of the universe.... gliding through my fingers, gently flowing across my body, and sometimes hurriedly. I feel rested and resting. Vitalised, full of energy but relaxed, that I could sleep I would rather savour awakening than sleep Right now life is worth living, experiencing, goals worth achieving. The reward feels real aand tangible. I might be able to access alternate dimensions while being here. Today I could even get enlightened. Today anything is possible, and everything is ok Today I feel royal love Love is the elixir of life, the fountain of youth and vitality Someone has finally open the door to my love I can now love myself as much as I can love her I can be free In this moment, everything is ok You have ...

It flows through you, inside and out... everything in between it's warm, sometimes hot it gushes, flows, churns This warmth could melt anything in it's way Oh this heat will burn my insides away This must be love No I haven't felt this before I'm nervous but not scared I'm anxious but not tense I'm gasping but not breathless I'm writhing but not hurt This must be love I feel purged, cleansed redeemed, resurrected fresh, rejuvinated bright, incandescent captivated, overwhelmed This must be love Logic doesn't make sense But I don't care I'm feel at home far away from home Home now could be anywhere There's no stopping us now This must be love I'm defenseless, I choose not to fight I don't feel the need to hide I'm not guilty, I'm not afraid I'm ready for whatever lies ahead This must be love The fluid of life runs through my veins A perfect synchrony in my heart and head Yes this must be ...

Listen man  you've got to swing when you're winning When the moment feels right You've got to capitalise When you feel the fabric of the universe laid bare You must identify it's every detail, learn every groove, feel the intricacy When you feel the force of life gushing through your veins You've got to let it run wild and guide you, become you, let loose When you feel the animal unleash, you must let it find it's prey. It's ok to feel strong It's ok to feel powerful It's ok to feel invincible It's ok to win Man, when the moment comes, you must be willing to let it in. You may stand tall enough ...and find the world crumbling below you You may find the world bow at your feet Don't fear, don't retaliate Just feel your fear, your energy Let your passions breathe..... Swing when you're winning, it's not going to happen all the time cease the moment when it's yours etch it into your memory, feed the e...

How many lessons must a man learn, before he can finally begin to live? How could he have ever learnt enough? How many mistakes must a man make before the lessons are embedded in his head? How many scars can he possibly erase? How many risks can a man avoid, before he makes the leap of faith? Can there ever be a thing like too much caution? How much certainty will guarantee that this next step will not be a mistake? How can he be sure anyway? How likely may a man predict the outcome of an arbitrarily probabilistic event to be favourable? Whyever might he believe it could ever be in his favour? How does man add up his karma points to know what he really deserves? Can he be sure of karma at all? How much can a man rely on his gut feeling if it promises to fulfil his dreams? Why might he ever trust something that cant be defined? How much suffering must a man go through before he can taste redemption? Will his suffering ever end? How many times must a man lose bef...

People achieve catharsis in different ways - exercise, sex, music, food, good sleep, friends, spending time with a loved one, alcohol, drugs. I do it through writing, or at least hope to. It's hard to put into words the intense (lack of) emotion I currently feel, but there has to be an outlet. Solace sounds like a distant and academically comforting term. So do friends, and lovers. There is nothing man can't do when he works to the best of his mental prowess, very little that he can without it's cooperation. Society rewards extroverts for their default behaviour. The world rewards and outward display of everything - emotions, words, opinions and actions. Even a temporary introvert must suffer the punishment of misjudgement, and decisions taken for him, on his behalf, without his permission. The world loves labels, although it's constituents hate being labelled themselves. Money matters, and so does drama. The best actor wins the prize for richest, most sought after, mo...

I try to make sense of it all, classify everyone I know into stereotypes. Well I guess everyone does. But it's funny how these stereotypes blend in, and it seems more like a spectrum than two extremes. Also, it's very queer and interesting how these perceptions of people I have change over time. I now understand that my mental picture of the world is not absolute. And while some have a more clear picture of what they see around them as others, ultimately they are all just perceptions. Life is dynamic. Nobody sucks forever, nobody is at the top forever. There is a constant ebb and flow, and one needs to be mindful about that. I now tend to recognise my own bursts of dopamine, some natural, some induced. But I try not to get too carried away by them, lest I turn into a candidate for a bipolar disorder. Things have been good, but of course they can be better. Then again, they have been worse, for me previously and for others now. It is always good to put things perspective and re...